Change and Stability

Songs and cliches about change have been floating in my head this past week. "Change is good" is the one that is most often coming to mind, over and over, as though I'm trying to convince myself and beat it into my core being.

Three things about change:

-Some things at my work will once again be changing in the near future. I'm not looking forward to it. The amount of change there gets tiresome for me and I allow myself to become stressed by the constant change. Things must change as part of the general flow of things, of people, of life. Too many changes in a short time leaves me kind of breathless and feeling like I'll never be caught up, never know what is going on. Change may be good, but stability is important to me.

-I'm trying to make small changes in my life, too. I've keyed into some of the concepts and ideas and actions that will help bring me closer to the lifestyle I want (need) for myself. Some small and simple changes will bring me so much closer to the person I long to be, but the comfort of now makes it very difficult to implement those changes. My whole life changed as a result of my meet-and greet with cancer, and my recent surgery this summer brought the message back to me. Yet I fall back into my old habits and patterns that do not move me forward. Why? I need to feel stable in myself so I can adjust to the changes, both internal and external.

-Once again, a paradox. No yin without yang. No tall without short. And no clarity without confusion. The answers will come to me as I muddle through the work changes and the patterns and habits I've established in my life. Patience and time.

"Change is good". "Rock solid". I need both.