Who Am I?

I stare at the pictures on my computer screen and search for myself in their faces. My great-grandmother, my grandmother, my mother. Karen to Emma to Edna to Kelly. I see some resemblances. Who were they, these women that came before me?  What made them laugh? Made them cry? What fed their souls? I look for me in my daughter. Five generations of women stare back at me from the screen. Who am I?

I begin each meditation with some simple questions. One of them is "Who am I?" I throw the question out there for God (the universe, the spirit, the force, etcetera) to answer. Whisper the answer quietly to me. Let me know, please. Let me be certain of who I am.

Three things about my search for my Self:

- I am a mother, a sister, an aunt, a friend, a daughter, a confidant, a family historian, a loyal employee. I've been a wife, a lover. I am my life roles.

- I am a project manager, a Toastmaster, a sometimes Improv player, a sometimes Tai Chi participant, a writer. I've been a waitress, a Dietary Technologist, a restaurant cook, a restaurant manager, a basketball and baseball player, a student. I am my life activities.

- I am loving, compassionate, witty, intelligent, kind, impatient, quick to judge, confusing and confused, shy, introverted, passionate. I've been angry, rejected and rejecting, fighting, running.  I am my life qualities.

I am all of these. I am my fore-mothers. I am part of nature, part of soul, part of God. I am learning, growing, finding, searching, reaching, striving always to BE. I am you.